True and Useful™

Loving-Kindness Meditation - Forgiveness

To begin, direct your whole attention inward and concentrate on your breathing. 

• Become aware of the breath as it moves in and out 
• Feel the rhythm as you inhale and then exhale
• Allow yourself to relax into the easy movement of your breath in and out

Once you are settled into your breathing focus, you can begin the Forgiveness Meditation.

Have forgiveness in your heart for anything you think you've done wrong. Forgive yourself for all the past omissions and commissions. They are long gone. Understand that you were a different person and this one is forgiving that one that you were. Feel that forgiveness filling you and enveloping you with a sense of warmth and ease.

Think of your parents. Forgive them for anything you have ever blamed them for. Understand that they too are different now. Let this forgiveness fill them, surround them, knowing in your heart that this is your most wonderful way of togetherness.

Think of your nearest and dearest people . Forgive them for anything that you think they have done wrong or are doing wrong at this time. Fill them with your forgiveness. Let them feel that you accept them. Let that forgiveness fill them. Realizing that this is your expression of love.

Now think of your friends. Forgive them for anything you have disliked about them. Let your forgiveness reach out to them, so that they can be filled with it, embraced by it.

Think of the people you know, whoever they might be, and forgive them all for whatever it is that you have blamed them for, that you have judged them for, that you have disliked. Let your forgiveness fill their hearts, surround them, envelope them, be your expression of love for them.

Now think of any special person whom you really need to forgive. Towards whom you still have resentment, rejection, dislike. Forgive him or her fully. Remember that everyone has dukkha. Let this forgiveness come from your heart. Reach out to that person, complete and total.

Think of any one person, or any situation, or any group of people whom you are condemning, blaming, disliking. Forgive them, completely. Let your forgiveness be your expression of unconditional love. They may not do the right things. Human beings have dukkha. And your heart needs the forgiveness in order to have purity of love.

Have a look again and see whether there's anyone or anything, any where in the world, towards whom you have blame or condemnation. And forgive the people or the person, so that there is no separation your heart.

Now put your attention back on yourself. And recognize the goodness in you. The effort you are making. Feel the warmth and ease that comes from forgiveness."

May all beings have forgiveness in their hearts!

Source: Buddha Dharma Education Association & BuddhaNet

Hawaii Forgiveness Project Images of Forgiveness Award 2007

Gold Medal
"Forgiveness"
Ann Cho, born 1993
colored pencil

presented at
International Forgiveness Day in Hawai'i

Forgiveness by John Greenleaf Whittier

My heart was heavy, for its trust had been
Abused, its kindness answered with foul wrong;
So, turning gloomily from my fellow-men,
One summer Sabbath day I strolled among
The green mounds of the village burial-place;
Where, pondering how all human love and hate
Find one sad level; and how, soon or late,
Wronged and wrongdoer, each with meekened face,
And cold hands folded over a still heart,
Pass the green threshold of our common grave,
Whither all footsteps tend, whence none depart,
Awed for myself, and pitying my race,
Our common sorrow, like a mighty wave,
Swept all my pride away, and trembling I forgave!

Forgiveness: a gift to yourself

Forgiveness is an act of the imagination. It dares you to imagine a better future, one that is based on the blessed possibility that your hurt will not be the final word on the matter. It challenges you to give up your destructive thoughts about the situation and to believe in the possibility of a better future. It builds confidence that you can survive the pain and grow from it.

Telling someone is a bonus! It is not necessary for forgiveness to begin the process that heals the hurt. Forgiveness has little or nothing to do with another person because forgiveness is an internal matter.

Excerpt from CelebrateLove.com

Quote of the Week

"He who cannot forgive breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass."

~ George Herbert

The Art of Forgiveness, Lovingkindness, and Peace By Jack Kornfield

The Art of Forgiveness, Lovingkindness, and Peace

By Jack Kornfield

Paperback: 224 pages
Publisher: Bantam; Reprint edition (April 29, 2008)

Bestselling author Jack Kornfield has put together a how-to book--his most ambitious work yet--to encourage the best side of humanity. In The Art of Forgiveness, Lovingkindness, and Peace, Kornfield uses the evocative power of aphorisms to spark feelings and thoughts that can germinate and grow. After a chapter of aphorisms and quotations on each of the title's three topics, Kornfield offers a related series of meditations that show how to cultivate what the aphorisms have prepared. Whereas essays tend to be read through and forgotten, this book invites a deliberate pace, with the reader filling in the blanks, taking time away for meditation, then coming back for more inspiration. Never descending into triteness, Kornfield is realistic on tough issues, encouraging awareness and persistence over resignation and indifference.

Kornfield strives to demonstrate that forgiveness is a process, and that it is possible for flawed and ordinary people to forgive others and themselves. A concluding section on inner peace is a humble and wise primer; Kornfield makes the point that true inner peace does not arise from withdrawal from the world but from greater connectedness with it. Each section includes actual rituals to encourage readers to forgive, practice lovingkindness and know peace.

If you yearn to open your heart, open the pages of Kornfield's latest.

How can I forgive when I feel so wronged?S-l-o-w Learner

It’s probably no accident that I chose forgiveness as this week’s theme. I’m working through a process of letting go of a job from which I was “laid off.” The pain comes on many fronts: the shock of feeling so expendable when I thought I was so important; the feeling of being either invisible or in attendance at my own funeral on my last day of work while everyone avoided me like the plague; the lack of any sense of regret or sadness from management or co-workers that I was leaving a company that I had poured my heart and soul into; the list goes on.

So I’m heartened by this week’s quote that to forgive sets me free. It’s so obvious that while I’m caught up in my drama and stories, the alleged sources of my hurt are moving merrily on their way. The act of forgiveness allows me to let go and move on as well.

By perceiving ourselves as the wronged party in any situation, we place ourselves at the center of the universe, when in fact we are only at the center of our own little universe of mind and ego. I find it endlessly fascinating that I can understand the power of forgiveness and yet be caught up for at least a while in the angst of life’s unfairness. My only ray of hope is that I seem to be able recognize the turmoil I create a little faster and move through it with a little more grace and compassion for all concerned.

To take forgiveness a step further, you may have heard of a philosophy called Ho'oponopono, which espouses that we take full responsibility for everything that happens, no matter whose fault we think it may be. Rather than merely forgiving the other, you make yourself accountable for the entire situation, including the behavior of all involved. This may sound challenging, but I have found that once I start down the road of forgiveness, it’s only a few more steps to reach the point of taking on the whole sorry state of affairs. In a way it acts as a great equalizer when we recognize that we are all probably doing the best we can, and stuff happens.

Here’s a handy little Ho'oponopono mantra I’m repeating as often as I remember while I complete the letting go of the recent past:

          I love you
          I’m sorry
          Please forgive me
          Thank you

Repetition generates a power all its own, and I’m reminded once again that the story of life is not just about me but about all of us.         ~ A.G.R

Forgiveness by Christine Peloquin

Artist: Christine Peloquin

~ Media: acrylic, charcoal, scarves, cotton fabrics and linen tablecloth on wood panel
~ To view more of this artist's extraordinary work, click here to visit her website.

Forgiveness

To forgive
Is not to forget.

To forgive
Is really to remember

That nobody is perfect

That each of us stumbles
When we want so much to stay upright

That each of us says things
We wish we had never said

That we can all forget that love
Is more important than being right.

To forgive
Is really to remember

That we are so much more
Than our mistakes

That we are often more kind and caring

That accepting another's flaws
Can help us accept our own.

To forgive
Is to remember

That the odds are pretty good that
We might soon need to be forgiven ourselves.

_________________

Author Unknown

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Quote of the Week

 

"To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you."

~Lewis B. Smedes